16
Apr

In life you run across people that seem to have obstinate angry dispositions.  I know personally i’ve had to tell several people that I fear they actually ENJOY being miserable.  It sounds unfathomable, but if you take a moment right now to think of some of the people in your own lives, I’m certain you can think of at least a couple who never seem to find steady happiness in any given situation. There’s always SOMETHING to complain about.  Now if that person is you, don’t be offended or get upset (although obviously that’s what this is about).   I just want you to entertain my ideas on this matter, because you could very well be slowly driving yourself and the people you love crazy.

I don’t believe that people consciously create negative energy, but I do believe that some of us have allowed ourselves to resign our personal happiness and succumb to a society’s ideal of happiness instead.  This in itself is an oxymoron, because we all know how negative society is a whole.  So what do I mean when I say we succumb to society’s ideal of happiness? In our country i’ve noticed that people are so spoiled that they’re impossible to satisfy.  People find a common bond in complaining, I mean after all it’s a conversation starter right? If i’m in a difficult or unfortunate situation with a stranger, for some reason being able to complain about the situation with them makes us both feel better temporarily.  We find comfort in each other’s misery because we can say to ourselves for that moment:  “great! someone is just as miserable as I am right now”.  This is the classic illustration of the phrase ‘misery loves company’. The problem is that some people are constantly miserable and because of that they are constantly complaining, whether other people are miserable or not.  You may not realize this, but if you are in fact one of those people, you could be a lot less liked than you think you are (don’t shoot the messenger).  People don’t tell you this because you’re already upset and believe it or not, they may not feel comfortable telling you to shut the hell up because they don’t want to come off as callous or inconsiderate.  Your complaining puts them in a socially awkward situation and taint that person’s perception of you.  You come off as whiney and attention seeking and neither of those are attractive traits.

Now don’t get me wrong, we all have close friends that we can share our problems with, that’s what friends are for.   Some people are naturally good listeners and give good sound advice.   Learn to appreciate those people who show genuine interest in your well being and don’t mind listening when you have an issue.  But it’s important to avoid having this permanent angry disposition with friends and acquaintances in general.   Your bad mood can and will ruin other people’s day.   They will leave you with a bad taste in their mouths and subconsciously that negative encounter or experience will stay with them, creating distance in friendship that may have otherwise grown into something meaningful.

So do I have any suggestions? I mean after all, I’m sitting at this computer screen posing as Dr. Phil, the least I could do is offer some advice on the matter right?  I would suggest that in the future you make a genuine effort to be happy.  It is said that happiness is a habit, as well as misery.  If you make happiness apart of your daily routine, you’d notice an immediate change in the way people greet you and respond to your presence.  People are naturally drawn to happy, confident individuals . . . mainly because we all wish to be happy and confident individuals.

The way I go about being happy and care free, is to take into account all of the things in my life that are simply awesome!

Wonderful friend(s)?

Loving and Supportive family?

A roof over my head?

Food on the table?

Clothing on my back (and in my closet)?

Smokin’ hot girlfriend(s) or boyfriend(s)?

A job?

A Car?

An education?

Two arms?

Two legs?

How about a binding personal relationship with your creator?

There has to be SOMETHING in your life worth being happy about! Even if you have to think about it all day long to keep that beautiful smile on your face, just do it.  Believe me, the world loves your smile . .  . well most of your smiles (I mean objectively speaking, some people just don’t have attractive smiles lol).  Ok but seriously, this only a suggestion, if complaining and being miserable is the way you like to roll, by all means do continue.  I acknowledge that as human beings we all experience varying emotions that are impacted by a number of elements that are out of our control.  I simply contest that YOUR ATTITUDE has always been and will always be the ultimate deciding factor in your happiness.

So CHEER UP :-)

ps: Part 2 coming soon, dedicated to a very special breed of miserable people we all hold near and dear to our hearts . . . most refer to them as HATERS!!!!

Related posts:

  1. Miserable People pt. II (HATERS)
  2. This is not a Trial Run . . .
  3. I’d Love To Have You, But I Don’t Need You
  4. Gay vs. Straight (Homo vs. Hetero)
  5. It all begins with one . . .

2 Responses to “Miserable People”

  1. davisgb Says:

    ok so while i do agree with you, there is something that i just want you to remember…its just as irritating to be around people who are faking being happy…you know…the ones that constantly talk about how happy they are or how over a situation they are yet they keep bringing it up… i mean i know you speak some things into existence including emotions but my advice would be to take your advice about the things you should appreciate, but also if you’re in that type of mood where you are just unhappy then keep to yourself for that day. Sometimes you just need some alone time to figure things out or you just don’t need to be bothered that day, whether you figure things out or not. This brings me to the idea of self reliance also. Learn to deal with problems on your own sometimes instead of constantly needing someone to listen to you. half the time you will get bad advice anyways. but if you just need someone to talk to that bad then…you might want to think about investing into therapy…bizarre in my opinion but sometimes it is actually necessary.

  2. Adam Says:

    I’d have to agree with you there, a friend was telling me the other day that people should take better advantage of mental health professionals. Our emotions can often times be over thought and over analyzed and it helps when you can take time to sit down and sift through them all. Get to the root of your problems. My main problem comes with watching people allow an incident to completely consume them. Every event that occurs in your life isn’t a crisis, or even an emergency for that matter. Being able to keep things in perspective is a skill that many people lack, including myself at times. I’ve noticed a difference in my quality of life ever since I began to allow myself to process things emotionally before I tried to address them rationally.

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