L.A.M = LOOK AT ME
At one point or another we’ll have to be honest about some of the problems that face The Black Community. One of the biggest issues that I feel we face, is the fact that our values as a culture are skewed in a way that drastically prohibits our long term financial growth and development. Some how, its become more important to APPEAR financially well off, as opposed to actually making real strides towards stability and comfort. This explains the title L.A.M or LOOK AT ME. There’s a saying that goes: “Why would you spend money you don’t have, to buy things you don’t want, to impress people you don’t like?”. Now why this statement doesn’t apply in every situation, it does sum up the basic flaw in our values as a culture. We spend far too much money on things that serve absolutely no purpose outside of getting other people’s attention. Its shown in our gaudy fashion taste, our loud hairstyles, stereo systems, big rims and of course our shiny chains. What’s funnier is that after we gain the attention of our peers and strangers everywhere, we look at them like its a problem. I have a neighbor that drives a mint green Monte Carlo with fake spinners and a pink Ralph Lauren polo horse on the side. The car also has speakers on the outside so that we may all enjoy whatever he’s listening to when he comes home. Despite all this, he still has a puzzled look on his face when people stare at his car. “Why these haters stay on my sh*t?!” or “What the f*ck these niggas lookin at?!?!”. Well . . . you have HUGE SHINY SHIT ON YOUR CAR and YOU’RE MAKING AN INSANE AMOUNT OF NOISE! Now in my neighbor’s defense, he’s not an isolated incident of poor logic. I mean to most it seems simple, if you have an abundance of sensory stimuli in your possession, chances are you will gather the attention of those around you. People respond to loud noises and shiny shit. Your rims serve no other purpose than garnering attention.
from cardomain.com
These things are done to portray a lifestyle. A lifestyle that the person often times cannot afford to live. People secretly and in some cases openly seek and covet the approval and attention of their peers. This becomes an even bigger problem, when the approval and attention that we seek becomes envy. In other words, our desire to be seen leads to flaunting and no good can come of the haves dangling their valuables in the face of the have-nots. Maybe this is why Soulja Boy and Young Berg are beaten for their chains or Waka-Flocka is shot at a car wash? What else do you expect when you show up around brothers that are starving with a chain around your neck that cost more than they’ve been able to earn in a life time?
I don’t say all these things to say that you shouldn’t want or enjoy nice things, but it is possible that our definition of “nice” is a bit off. Its a sad state of affairs when your car and its accessories are higher on your priority list than your living arrangements.
Soulja Boy's remote control car chain (from starpulse.com)
It should be understood that this isn’t due to some innate fault of black people. The behavior itself isn’t necessarily abnormal but it is misguided. One of man’s basic needs is to feel important. We all seek this attention in one form or another, our problem is that what’s popular in our culture is ultimately wasteful and pointless. There’s a lack of planning, foresight and value of actual substance.
We live to be fresh today and hope that we can keep it up tomorrow. This is especially bothersome and compounded by the fact that we face many other issues that have already crippled us as a people.
To delve into the multitude of issues we face and how they each play an individual role, all while being interconnected with one another in the systematic and gradual breakdown of our community and culture would require an immense amount of words. More words than I care to fit into one post, but I do feel the need to share that when I speak on the issue of our values, it’s about more than just money. We must learn to value our futures, both individually and as a community. That discussion, I plan on having with you on another day.
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April 6th, 2010 at 2:20 pm
One of the many symptoms of are cultural post traumatic stress syndrome…
All human beings seek validation. Our culture in particular seems to have a weak spot for seeking it in the envy of others. I guess it makes sense when you are denied everything for so long. How do we tackle it though? Will our fixation on material wealth only shift when the vast majority of us aren’t poor. Will that ever happen?
April 6th, 2010 at 10:01 pm
Like you said, its a cultural issue. I honestly believe it stems from what we consider most valuable. We have a poor understanding of finance outside of cash and employment checks. As a whole, we know little about investing, little about saving and so on. Its an education issue.
Really difficult to tackle in one swoop because its so layered. Our children admire the things I’ve mentioned above because our culture and its most visible role models value them as well. Which is obviously an issue that goes back to parenting and the lack thereof, on a deeper level the possibility that parents are now young and impressionable enough to have the same role models their children have. It boils down to shifting the value from fluff to substance, as vague as that may sound. It needs to become more common practice to set up college savings for children and things of that nature. What would you suggest?
April 6th, 2010 at 11:47 pm
Hmm. Like you said it comes down to values. Children get their values from their parents. Parents get their values from their upbringing. Their upbringing is influenced by their community. Our communities are in a state of utter decay.
Taking it back 40 years ago, when we as people mostly held the same socio-economic status, attaining material wealth wasn’t as important because nobody had any money and chances are you wouldn’t be getting much more. We valued different things, community, our rights. We were able to organize and take a united front because WE wanted them so badly. With integration, we have been forced into the main stream and traded our African collectivism for their American individualism. Doctors and lawyers moved out of all black neighborhoods, taking with them their influence as well as their tax money. We are now selfish and self centered. It is no longer the case that when I do well, we do well. The solution lies in retaining the values that made us great.
How do we find those? I have no idea because it was such a great chain of events that made us lose them in the first place. It would take something huge to unite us. Truly unite us. Any idea what that could be?
April 7th, 2010 at 3:49 am
Well for starters we know it isn’t a Black President. That’s no shot at Obama, just a reminder to us that there is no earth shattering magic wand that will do the trick. It does take a reinforcement of responsibility upon those doctors and lawyers you’ve mentioned. Abandoning our communities have left them crippled and suffering.
There are numerous approaches that can be taken, for one I think adult education is in order. We are people that need certain information and education that simply will not be offered in public school systems. For us to be as obsessed with material things as we are, we have very little understanding of money and how it works. Those of us that have that understanding, need to share this knowledge and do so enthusiastically!
You pointed out the individualistic American values that we’ve adopted and I think you’re absolutely right. Quite frankly, we can’t afford to be for self. We have to acknowledge that we are a special case and when a few successful black people abandon the rest, the entire race suffers within this society. We didn’t make any of the progress we made during the first 100 years of emancipation by being individualistic, consequently, the moment we strayed away from community and collectivism is the moment we became stagnant and eventually to the state of decay we see now. We are at a point now in which we literally kill one another, more often than not over material values.
April 7th, 2010 at 4:19 pm
Like you said Adam there is no single fix to the problem. Its hard to change a culture because its not a physical thing, and everyone may have their own idea of what the African American Culture should be. One step in the right direction would be to hold each other to higher standards. Too many times do we let things slide because they are funny in the moment. I know i’m guilty of perpetuating ignorance for the sake of laughter.